JOY IN THIS MOMENT

For awhile I've been wanting to get to Ollie's Bargain Outlet to get some more books for my girls. They are both loving books right now and we can't seem to have enough books. I mean we have plenty, but since they love it so much I was wanting to get some new ones to feed into their interest. We go to the library on a mostly weekly basis getting about 20 books at a time, but I am not exaggerating when I say we read that pile every day. I just haven't seemed to be able to get to Ollie's. And then a friend of mine sent me an email inviting me to a "book party". She had recently cleaned out her girls's closet and wanted to give away some books that they are no longer using. Wow! I couldn't believe the timing of this email and the generosity of my friend. So yesterday we went to her house and had a great time playing, and left with two big bags of wonderful, beautiful, enriching books. As I was leaving, my friend also asked if she could send home s...

In college, a few of my friends and I were obsessed with Elisabeth Elliott and mostly her book, "Passion and Purity". I remember Betsy talking about how when she was lonely she looked for opportunities to serve God by loving and serving others-  and that cured the loneliness. I've thought of this often since then and have found it true in my own life. Yesterday, my doctor's office called and said they saw two different subchorionic hematomas on my ultrasound. This was totally out of the blue and something I have never heard before. I felt confused and in shock. I've already been a little on edge this week as I'm 11 weeks along. That's when we lost our second baby. So I've just been living with a dark cloud over my head for the past few days with a fear of impending doom. I was pretty emotional and so I tried to explain it to Sophie that we just really need to be praying that the new baby stays healthy and strong. She told me as we prayed, "Mom...

Wes has been off since Friday morning and it's been wonderful. After a year of almost no weekends off, a 3 day weekend has been so refreshing and also so restful. He's been working on building a retaining wall and fire pit in the backyard but other than that, we've not really worked on anything. Yesterday was especially restful and wonderful. We were supposed to have the Nicosia's over for dinner but Olivia is sick. I was so bummed because I was really looking forward to that time with them. Since we had plenty of food for dinner, we decided to invite Ambri and Dane and kids over to eat and then we took the boat out for a bit. The kids just had the best time playing with each other, laughing, going on the boat, and making memories. I feel so blessed to have family so close by and have kids so close in age to Ambri's. It's just built-in life-long friends and it's been so fun watching them grow in their friendship as they grow older. After they left, Wes bui...

That's what the doctor said as she found our littlest baby's heart beat today. And my heart melted. Isn't that what motherhood is? Our heartbeat's all mixed up with each other? My mom once told me that I am her heart that beats outside her body. I thought that was the sweetest thing to ever say. And then I became a mom myself and realized that's the perfect way to describe my love and devotion to my children. Thank you Lord, for filling my quiver one by one. Truly I am blessed. And thank you for the gift of hearing a new heartbeat today.

This morning I was reading from Matthew where Jesus teaches his disciples how to pray. He says to ask of God,  "give us this day our daily bread". This first trimester has been the hardest of them all. Even after we had a miscarriage at 11 weeks and pregnant again two weeks later- which was like 26 weeks long of a first trimester- this is worse. I feel pretty sick and miserable most of the time, I'm exhausted, and so very emotional. But I have seen the Lord provide my daily bread, day in and day out. He fills me up. He gives me all I need for each day. And not to just survive, but to laugh and find joy, and rest. One of the greatest gifts He gives me on a daily basis is waking me up each morning to spend time with Him. Liza still fluctuates in her wake up time and so the Lord wakes me up at the right time so we have enough time to spend together. Usually it's around 5:45. Today it was 6:30. And Liza slept in until almost 8:00! That's unheard of for her but the Lor...

Today we didn't leave the house at all. No errands. No meeting up somewhere with someone. Home all day. And I'm not trying to be legalistic about it all. If someone would have asked us to get together we would have. Or if I had errands to run I would have. But I'm just not going out of my way to leave the house. Sophie helped me bake some blueberry scones. We cleaned the mudroom. And then this afternoon we had friends over- my friend Leigh has two precious little ones that are my kids' age so it was perfect and fun. The kids played great and Sophie was such a good little hostess.  Sharing her toys and laughing. Kissing the baby and making sure she was okay. Waving to them as they left and saying to me, "Mommy I had so much fun!" It was a great day. And truthfully I loved being home all day. I loved the opportunity to have friends over to our house and practice hospitality and sharing. And opening the doors to allow others the chance to enjoy this space and all...

Lately I've been feeling the Lord speaking to my heart the importance of being home. With Wes's work schedule and the amount of hours he works, I often like to make plans or get out of the house to help the days go faster. The Lord's been calling me to just be home. Make home a fun place for the girls. A place they love to be. So, I'm trying. My days are slow and long. But what a blessing! In a world where everyone else wants time to slow down, where everyone else is so busy, I get to be at home with my two sweet girls getting to witness their whole entire day. Experiencing every single thing they are. And enjoying one another. Wes was off yesterday and I thought it would be fun to go for a hike in the afternoon. To have a nice big breakfast together, have a lazy morning playing playmobil and reading books, but after nap get in the car, get some ice cream from McDonalds, and go for a little hike. Sophie was so excited about it she was talking so fast and so much as I ...

The Lord is constantly at work in my every moment of the day. And I thought I might just use this space to give Him some glory and praise and really try and recognize and remember His good gifts. A day goes by and I already forget the gifts He gave me yesterday. I want to be better about writing it down so I can share with my girls as they grow, just how good God is, in the every day. Liza who is now one, seems to be cutting her first molar. She is miserable and clingy. Last night she woke up as we were going to bed and nothing seemed to calm her down except just holding her. Wes was happy to rock her for a bit, because he's just such a good father and Liza especially adores  him and seems to prefer him. He rocked her for awhile but when he tried to lay her down she started to cry again, so I came in so Wes could get some sleep. Today he starts his new job as a police officer at Lock Haven City. Such a blessing to have this job and I wanted to make sure he got a good nights sleep...